Is it just me or do Mommy/boy fantasies come off as creepier than Daddy/girl?
If you’ve been following along, you know I’m not in (nor have I been in) a D/s relationship. Someday, hopefully, I will be in one, and then we (my hypothetical future domme and I) will work out our dynamic ourselves. Maybe it will be a simple Domme/Sub sort of deal, maybe we’ll want to add some roleplaying into our daily routine. When I think about the possibility generally my preference skews towards wanting an Owner/toy dynamic, but I think it’s only Freudian discomfort that gives that precedence over the Mommy/boy thing.
It might be a case of pop-cultural awareness, where Daddy/girl fantasies get more exposure, and are generally shown in a light where the “girl” is getting hot. Whereas on the flipside if a dude who want to be his lover’s “little boy” he comes across as a future Norman Bates. (or, at least that’s how I feel it would be perceived if I tried to explain it to a significant other.)
Thinking about this, I realize I view the fantasy from the submissive perspective in both cases. Meaning I put myself in the mental shoes of the femsub calling her Dom “Daddy”, as well as the Males sub calling his Domme “Mommy.”
This probably colors my thinking, because what women think is hot is OK, but what guys think is hot is probably perverted. I don’t actually beleive that, but it definitely works its way into my thoughts.
It’s just as likely that a femsub with a little girl fantasy is harboring an Electra complex as any dude that wanted “mommy” to punish him really ought to have a talk with his shrink. (Note: I’m not saying either of these fantasies are symptoms of mental illness, but that if one was, then it is just as likely for the other one to be as well.) I should probably say, that neither is likely to be indicative of mental weirdness.
I tried looking at this from the dominant’s perspective, and reached a similar bias. My mental Daddy-Dom feels like he ought to be driving around in a windowless van whereas the mental idea of a Mommy-domme fell flat, I had a hard time picturing what made this hot for her, mostly she just seemed a little odd, but ultimately harmless. (There was less sex and much more milf and cookies in that fantasy. er ah, Milk and cookies)
Full disclosure, I started writing this several day ago, and then a commenter by the name of Clarence, left a link to a blog called Stummy Rumblings, and a six part post on societies view of The Dominatrix (and by extension the submissive male) as an archetype. which has me thinking that any squickiness for mommy/boy play is probably just holdover from the ingrained cultural hatred for male submission.
Which is a bummer cause, I’d like to think I’m above this sort of self loathing, and also an equal opportunity pervert.
Actually,
I find daddy/baby girl stuff about as creepy as mommy/baby boy stuff (typically about a 5 or 6 on a 10 scale, but Norman Bates rates higher). People are free, of course, to do whatever spins their wheels but that is my two cents.
Then again, I find male submission very attractive and even sexy… so I am not really the norm.
Like I said, it does something for me but it’s negated by the unfortunate implications. While I try not to fault people for what turns them on, I never really saw the appeal of the sexy school girl thing (other than, you know.) Sexy librarians on the other hand…
When I became a mother myself, one of the things I experienced was how thoroughly the culture seemed interested in desexualizing me. I have to say, I feel rather grateful for the cultural notion of “MILF” simply for creating a notional space for women with children to be sexual and desireable, even if in a rather narrow way.
I’m switchable, and I’ve been both the little and the Daddy (I’m not particularly girly). Like foot fetishism, ageplay and their siblings daddy/daughter, mommy/boy are among the interests that even many kinky people feel entitled to laugh at. *shrug* I get to be cutting edge without hardly trying, I guess.
It stings to think that what makes you tick is either “weird” or fodder for comedy, It is comforting to be able to say, that at least your fantasies aren’t as weird as those other guys.
You know, I’m sure some day Stifler’s Mom will be held up as a paragon of womanly virtue
Lol @milf and cookies
That literally made me laugh at the keyboard.
I find Daddy/baby girl dynamics more creepy. Mommy/baby boy comes off as more comforting and harmless. I see the maternal figure as guiding and loving. Daddy/baby girl gives off some kind of odd predatory air and makes me uncomfortable whenever I see it in someone’s profile. Though this is probably because the older man/younger woman dynamic makes me think of an old lecher taking advantage of a young girl.
I don’t think there’s anything inherently wrong with either of these ways of living, one just makes me feel downright awkward.
Though I have been involved with men much older than me, I was the Dominant partner, and that made all the difference because there wasn’t that “wolfish” quality.
Lady D
I often feel as if that there is something wrong with an older man dating a younger woman, but not vice versa. I’m not entirely sure why though.
Well, I know it’s something I’ve seen older women complain about. Maybe because it feels like they’re dipping the dating pool by cheating. I’m not sure how it works for young malesubs, but I know young maledoms have a hard time finding someone because all the girls their age prefer older men. But who knows what either our subconscious reasons could be? Ha.
Lady D
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