I mentioned the other day that I signed up for OKcupid. I’m still sort of apprehensive about it, I think I probably should have waited to take a stab at this, until I was a little more satisfied in a few other areas. But one thing I do like to do is talk about myself (hence the blog) and answer questions. That’s How OkCupid’s matching program seems to run, by asking you tons of questions. So far I’ve answered 188, and I think they might have a pretty decent framework of who I am. (I’m less confident about peoples ability to interpret the information accurately, but that’s another matter.)
One thing that I thought of after seeing this, is how men, particularly submissive men, are told so often that we’re not a hot commodity. It’s hard to imagine that someone is ever going to value you if you believe you’re a dime a dozen. But looking at a graph like this makes me realize that I stand out. I am different that the majority of guys my age, for a woman who wants nice Christian boy, (who is submissive and kinkier than a garden hose) I’m one of a kind.
Also a I’m cute as whip, and that don’t hurt either.
Read this and thought of you. It’s not exactly surprising, but the eye-tracking stuff is a kinda interesting… http://news.discovery.com/tech/men-dont-read-online-dating-profiles-120207.html#mkcpgn=rssnws1 Write well… women read. 🙂
That makes sense, I typically scan a profile, before looking at a match’s vital info and personality matrix. I think
I ought to sit down and give my front page a serious overhaul, if that’s what women are going to be most focused on.
Sorry… I’m back. I don’t really know you, but I would question the whole “less independent” thing. Not wanting to be independent doesn’t mean you can’t be. Since your unpartnered and smart, and since I’ve read what you’ve written, I assume you are independent… I assume you just don’t want to be independent.
From that bar to the left of “Less independent,” I wouldn’t get that. I might mistakenly thing you *need* someone else to do whatever, not that you *want* someone else to do whatever.
I certainly wouldn’t want you to be dishonest in answering the questions, but I don’t want the graph to misrepresent you either (or leave you open to less-than-kind women).
Don’t apologize, I like having you around. While I am an independent person, I think it is not inaccurate to say that I have a co-dependent personality. I don’t think that is a bad thing, I am wired for, and I prefer to be in a relationship.
I think my rating there reflects that questions asking whether I’d want to do a or b, if my partner wants to do b? I tend to answer, with (Fuck man, I’ll do whatever she wants to do.)
But as you said, women viewing my personality profile, may not pick up on less-independent=she gets her way more often, and think it means their going to have to take care of my ass.
188 questions? Are you sure this is a dating website and not an FBI investigation?
Sheesh, I can just see Robert DeNiro going over these results.
I’m kidding, and I hope it works, and good for you trying.
I also agree with what dumbdomme wrote above. You don’t strike me as someone not independent. I wonder if you went out of your way answering certain questions to convey submissive tendencies and the program misread those answers.
I wonder if you went out of your way answering certain questions to convey submissive tendencies and the program misread those answers.
Out of my way? no, but some of the questions have specifically applied to D/s preferences, and quite honestly in most situations I am likely to submit to my partners preferences. It makes me happy to make the people I care about happy and the behaviors and attitudes that I consider simply not being pig-head OKCupid interprets as a lack of independence.
and to find a “not a pig-head” is SO high up there on the list, believe me.
I know right? I’m such a swell guy, someone ought just have her way with me already.
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