Submissive in Seattle

Premature

Premature

I have a plan.

Or rather, I had a plan, for the next five months. I was going to hit the Gym, find a new job, and then shop around for the best way to start actively seeking a partner.

I signed up for OKcupid the other day.

So far, I’m not sure how I feel about it. In general I’ve never liked the idea of online dating, it’s so unromantic, to have a computer find you a partner. Still I’m looking for something so particular that I need some help.

I don’t know if I will have better luck finding someone who fits with me on all the levels I need, by looking for compatible women in “vanilla” spaces and hope they’re open to being dominant (more than open) or by looking for compatibility in BDSM oriented spaces, trying to find a domme, who shares my values.

When it comes to setting up a profile, I don’t know how much of this information to lead with. If I mention the Christian thing, am I going to lose all the kinky ladies, cause I sound too uptight? If I mention my kinks am I going to freak out the Christian girls, cause I sound like a perve?

Meanwhile neither of those things addresses the rest of who I am and what I’m into, even though they’re an important part of the framework of who I am, There are so many other facets to my personality.

Dominance is important in a significant other, because it turns me on, not just sexually, but emotionally I am comforted by the idea of having someone to make certain decisions.

But, If I’m going to hand over control of my life to someone, it’s super important that she is a Christian, and is going to lead me (am I really about to say this?)  along the path of righteousness.

Even if I find those two things, I still want more. (greedy bugger aren’t I?) I want a smart, funny, hyper-literate, verbose, empathetic, sarcastic, pop-culture junkie with goals, and motivation. (with finger nails that shine like justice, and a voice that is dark, like tinted glass.)

Anyway, advice on the Okcupid sitch, anyone? What do you think I should lead with?

5 thoughts on “Premature

  1. Lady Donovan

    Nice Cake reference. For the record though, I believe that song is more so mocking that type of women considering the lead singer’s critical approach towards capitalism, but I won’t get into lyrical interpretation…cause that’s not the point of my comment. =P

    I’ve never used an online dating site, but I can say that I always find people the second I stop looking for them. =)

    So…no advice to offer. Maybe I should give it a shot too. They have BDSM dating sites though, I’m sure of it.

    Lady D

    1. Peroxide

      “They have BDSM dating sites though, I’m sure of it.”

      I feel like the percentage of nice Christian women on BDSM dating sites, is probably lower than the percentage of dominant inclined women on vanilla sites.

      1. Lady Donovan

        Divide and conquer? Or some catchy phrase…
        You could be surprised. The current guy I’ve been talking too romantically randomly messaged me out of the blue on Fetlife. Nervous as hell. The only message he’d ever sent out on Fetlife before and he’d been member for a while. Also my age, not an idiot, and likes My Little Pony and the color pink. And we’ve been friends for….a good 5 months?
        Sometimes things just happen. You could find a wonderful Christian woman who’s having the same thoughts you are right now. Don’t miss out because of doubts (okay, I’ll leave the motivational phrases alone now).

        Lady D

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