Submissive in Seattle



I’m totally wiped out today. Too tired to finish a post I’ve been working on, or to write fiction, though I have something in the works I’m excited about. But, I want to write something, and since I’m having trouble getting to sleep I figured I share a bit about the wonderful spanking I got last night.

Tavi is still sick, So I expected that Wednesday night would just be loafing about. We do that quite a bit. She sits on the couch and I sit on the floor at her feet. Right now we’re watching Archer. Occasionally, she’ll hurt me during that. Twisting my nipples, making me beg for mercy as I try not to scream.

After Dinner, we watched a couple episodes of Archer, and Tavi asked me if I’d wanted to watch one more, or a get quick beating. I wavered momentarily, and she ordered me to the bedroom.

I stripped and knelt nervously at the foot of the bed as Tavi got her cane out. Bent over the mattress I buried my face in a pillow and gripped at her fuzzy comforter. She started by tapping away at a bruise on my thigh left over from last time.

As she got me warmed up with the cane I had to stop her, because I was biting down too hard on my temporary crown. She fetched a handkerchief and gagged me with it, so I could bite down without fear of cracking my dental work. She warmed me up with the cane before telling me to stay put, while she fetched a wooden spoon.

The spoon hurts a lot. It isn’t so sharp as the cane, but it packs a hell of a wallop. Because we haven’t had a ton of time together, because Tavi has been so busy and sick, and because I’m trying so hard to be a good toy, I worked really hard at staying still. I was good at keeping my knees stationary, though keeping my ass out and up was more challenging.

After Tavi had destroyed my right cheek she moved onto the left, which hurt more, I think.  I screamed and screamed into he pillow, I squirmed and wiggled, trying so hard to stay put and wanting so badly to get away. I wanted to cry because of the pain, but I couldn’t. The pain was becoming too much I was having a hell of time stay still, and I ended up saying yellow, it took me a few tries to articulate it through the gag, but I didn’t want to end the fun, no matter how bad it hurt.

Tavi paused and confirmed that I was OK, before giving me a few more hard licks with the spoon (I suspect she was trying for a nice even all over color.) She ten told me I was going to get ten more spanks on each cheek, but that since I was gagged she would count for me.

It is a rather lovely color on me isn't it?

It is a rather lovely color on me isn’t it?

Her count was faster than mine, but I liked that. During a count I can barely articulate the each number. Knowing that as soon as it crosses my lips I’m going to get another, I just can’t force the word out. Tavi, has no such difficulty. She gave me enough time to breath between each one, and then gave me another.

When she finished I sat up and she untied my gag, and I just broke down. It was like the gag had been holding the tears in. I sobbed into her shoulder as she comforted me. She told me how good I had been, how brave I was, how hot it was for her.

She joked that at least one of us would be getting off tonight. That makes me ecstatic.  Even though I’m not ashamed of my submission, crying makes me feel vulnerable and a bit emasculated, knowing that she’s soaking wet at the sight of my tear stained face and quivering lips, makes that go away and I feel good, because I’m making her feel good.

We cuddled and kissed until her phone beeped and she had to kick me out so we could both get some sleep. I drove home a little high and with a burning backside.

9 thoughts on “Spooning

  1. Neophyte

    Not what I expected when I saw the title. Partly because I’m naive like that, and partly because perhaps my best experience with D/s started out with spooning, although with me as the little spoon.

  2. writingthebody

    This is really beautiful. The love at the end is amazing and that feeling of breaking down like that is what all of us masochists want to happen. The best I seem to manage is the occasional shock, or fits of trembling….but to cry like that is really healing and wonderful. You two sound like you have a great relationship….do treasure each other, and it!

    1. Peroxide

      Yeah, the breakdown is enormously delightful. It’s taken some work to make it happen, and little things, (like having a gag in) can hold it back.

      I’ve found that certain types of pain bring it faster for me. Being punched in the chest repeatedly, usually gets the waterworks going. Headspace is also important, being comfortable enough with Tavi to let go, took time. I’ve held back in the past because of time constraints as well. Hopefully, you can find what helps you get the release you want.

    1. Peroxide

      Are you referencing my use of yellow? Because, that went perfectly smoothly, I think. I was reaching a point where I was concerned I might safeword, not because she was pushing too far, but because I was reaching a point where I felt less able to control my response to the pain. It hurt, and I knew I had an off switch.

      By yellowing, I got a brief pause and and glimpse of the finish line, and that was enough to keep me going.

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